The Illusion of Stagnation: Why Your Small Wins Count

Posted on January 28th, 2026

If you're a survivor of Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD), you know that recovery is anything but a straight line. Some days feel like massive leaps forward, and others feel like you're stuck in the mud. In those moments of perceived stagnation, the voice of trauma can be incredibly cruel, whispering a toxic lie: You’re not making any progress.

Let’s dismantle that lie today. You and I are works in progress. That truth is freedom. And the voice of C-PTSD will try to tell us our progress doesn’t count until we’ve reached our ultimate goal—but that’s simply not true.

The Lie of the "Ultimate Goal"

Trauma loves black-and-white thinking. It demands perfection and complete erasure of the past. It sets an impossible "ultimate goal"—like "I won't be healed until I never get triggered again"—and then uses your daily stumbles as "proof" that you're failing.

Realistic recovery happens in increments and in response to micro choices. The healing journey is not a massive jump across a chasm; it’s a million small steps forward, a few steps sideways, and occasionally, a momentary pause to rest.

Your nervous system doesn't heal because you suddenly achieved some monumental milestone. It heals because of the small, consistent choices you make every single day.

Your Micro Choices Are Your Milestones

What are these micro choices? They are the quiet, internal acts of courage that often go unnoticed by the world, but are everything to your healing:

• You Felt the Feeling and Didn't Numb Out: You allowed yourself to feel the rush of panic or the wave of sadness without immediately reaching for a distraction or a numbing behavior. That is progress.
• You Paused Before Reacting: Instead of lashing out or shutting down, you took a single, conscious breath. You created a space between the trigger and your response. That is progress.
• You Sent the Text, Even Though You Were Afraid: You chose to be vulnerable, to ask for help, or to set a small boundary, despite your fear of rejection. That is progress.
• You Took a Shower/Ate a Meal: You engaged in an act of basic self-care on a day when your body was begging you to stay frozen. That is progress.
• You Corrected the Lie: You heard the inner critic tell you you’re worthless, and you consciously replaced it with, "That was the trauma talking; I am worthy." That is progress.

Remember, your brain has been trained to look for danger, not evidence of safety. You have to consciously override that programming. Take inventory of your micro choices. Your small wins are the literal building blocks of a new, safer nervous system.

You are a work in progress, and that is a beautiful, powerful place to be. Every choice you make to show up for yourself today is a monumental victory. Give yourself credit for the climb.